Stop Your Divorce by Revisiting Your Marriage Expectations
When we get married, we all have certain expectations about what we expect that marriage to be like. Sometimes these expectations come with us from our childhood, our own parents or even what TV and other media have taught us about marriage. Sometimes we carry our own personal dreams of what marriage is until the big day comes for us.
Then many of us discover once we’re married that it’s not how we expected or that our spouse doesn’t live up to those dreams and expectations that we had. This can be disaster for a marriage, especially if your partner is feeling the same way.
Sometimes people get married in an attempt to have someone to share their life with. Some people get married because they think they can find someone to help them be happy. Some do it because they want to spend the rest of their lives with someone they love and with someone who loves them back. Other people look for marriage as a way to have what they were lacking while growing up in their own homes.
Some people are afraid of growing old alone so they get married to have someone by their side. These are all great benefits to marriage but they’re not the foundation that will keep the marriage together alone. A good marriage needs a strong foundation and so many people rush into marriage for all the wrong reasons and then wonder later why it doesn’t work out.
If you want to stop your divorce, take some time to revisit your marriage expectations. Why did you get married? Why did you choose your spouse? What did you think the marriage was going to be like before your wedding? Did this change after you were married? How did this change over the time you have been married?
If you look at marriage like a contract, you will see that there is no escape clause. Conditions cannot be placed on marriage. Two people enter into this unconditional commitment with each other. Many vows themselves even say “in sickness and in health” and “for better or for worse”.
The marriage contract doesn’t state that you promise to love one another provided the husband always picks up his dirty clothes from the floor. It doesn’t say the committment is broken if someone starts making more money than the other. There are no ifs or unless she does this statements in that contract.
Yet people think that if things don’t go exactly as planned or exactly their way, they can just give up on the contract and walk away from the marriage. This doesn’t mean that you have to be completely submissive to the other person or allow them to do whatever they want. You may still get hurt or angered by things that your spouse does from time to time, however.
However, there are ways to handle these types of problems as they arise without turning to divorce. You can stop your divorce if you realize this and take the steps to re-evaluate your marriage expectations.
