Survive Your Breakup

Posts Tagged ‘dating after divorce’

Nanette Geiger, Law of Attraction RelationshipBest Selling Author, writes… …

For many dating is a scary game. In the first installment of Dating Consciously, the dating advice I shared was I asked … “What if I could show you how to clarify your objectives before you get disillusioned by the dating scene”? I also said that “Your thoughts create your reality and if that’s so, wouldn’t you like to know what’s really behind those pesky thoughts that keep you going through dates like the proverbial ‘revolving door’?”

In Part Two, I’ll go more deeply into the aspects of playing where everyone wins. Play with Passion and Purpose. Dating is a game you can re-write the rules at any time. To play the Dating Consciously game, you need to know that:

1. You are playing a game

2. You willingly remember that it’s going to be fun (because you created it as a game for that purpose), and

3. There are only winners

Remeber when you played tag or hide and seek? You could play for hours and hours. Simple, and sheer innocence. Try to access that innocence just for a moment right now.

Where did it go? In the previous paragraph notice how quickly it returned – if just for a moment – but it did return! You create that kind of ease and joy by simply remember it into being. You pretend it into existence, you play it into reality for the sake of playing. And guess what? Your energy shifts so quickly to that light and high vibration, that unless you negate it with old patterns, you become very attractive. You become a magnet to your desires.

The 2 Biggest Stoppers to Dating Consciously

1. Fear of failure/rejection

2. Fear of looking bad/not enough

1. The fear of failure is very human Try on innocence and play full out. Just try it and see how different it feels. Nobody is out to take something from you that you’re not willing to give.] Certainly, there may be different expectations from your date. There’s nothing wrong with that. Simply and clear communication can handle that. Believe me, you’re going to have different expections and points of compatibility. If you didn’t, you’d get awfully bored of that person in a very short period of time. If you decide that you only wanted one play date, so be it. There’s no inherent rejection involved. It’s just a choice on how you or he/she prefers to spend their time. It’s just a choice not a rejection.

2. Do you have a case of the not-enoughers?

You feel that you’re just not good enough on some level. Consider that at the core, everyone has that ancient internal conversation, too. Most everyone at times feels low in self-confidence. You’re not alone here.

Do your best to remain present and on your purpose is to have fun. Think of it as an exploration. “What’s something new can I learn about myself or my date?” Now you’ve just paved an energetic pathway for your date.

Playing a game is a very differnt approach to dating. Play with self-expression with the focus on having fun. Purpose means deliberating intending what you’re up to. The bottom line is HAVE FUN.

The high energy of fun is attractive and magnetic. Let go. You’ll become a magnet for fun people and if you keep practicing that, eventually you’ll attract the perfect fun mate.

You can learn these tools and more with Relationship Coaching. Dating, like life, if approached as a fun game where there are no losers goes much more smoothly for everyone.

Nanette Geiger, Law of Attraction Relationship Specialist, writes… …

Are you tired of wading through one date after another to find Mr. or Ms. Right? Are you ready to get back into the dating after your divorce? Then you’re probably not dating just for the fun of it. In other words, it’s not a sport or a hobby for you. Most likely you’re looking for interesting conversation with another compatible person. Someone with whom you can share good conversation, fun activities and match up on a number of similar interests.

Whether you’ve just ended a long term relationship, are seeking your soulmate, or are tired of browsing the on-line dating sites, it’s time you consider dating consciously.

Would you like to get clear about what you want and then zero in on attracting fun dating companions?

Your thoughts create your reality – so wouldn’t you like to know what’s really behind those pesky thoughts that keep you going through dates like the proverbial ‘revolving door’?

You can make a fun game of it and I’ll show you how — to find a really fun and loving relationship.

Is your curiosity peaked?

Of course it does!

I’ve encapsulated my tried and true Law of Attraction approach of winning the dating game. It’s called Dating Consciously. Just for the fun of it I’ve designed a 3 Part Series on Dating Consciously designed to get you moving in the higher vibration of getting what you really want, whether that’s attracting your soul mate or just having fun dating.

In the first of this Dating Consciously Series I’d like to address “The Game” portion of The Dating Game. Dating is a GAME!

First, let’s define the word GAME…

1. Game:An amusement or pastime.

2. Game: An activity where you compete it involves endurance or skill on the part of two or more persons who play according to a set of rules, for your own interest or for the interest of observers.

The second definition sums up the way most of us feel about dating.

But, if it’s not fun, why do it?

For many, the second definition kills the joy and has you sitting on the sofa Saturday nights. Those elements are:

Competitive activity, Skill, Chance, Endurance and Rules. These are definite fun-busters!

Curiously enough, these are precisely what you want to stay away from when dating.

FIVE Things To DO When Dating

1. Play. Simple as it may seem, most people don’t think of dating as play. You played all day long when you were a kid. How sublime was that? No place to go, nothing to prove. Just pure fun! If your date is the somber type, make it your priority to have fun. Make it your game to find fun. You don’t have to see them again if they aren’t playful.

2. Laugh. A cousin of play, laughter is very contagious. Before going on any date, especially a first date, remind yourself that you will consciously look for reasons to feel good and laugh. Smile a lot. At the waitress or waiter, at the host. Just smile for no reason.

3. Listen. This is such an important way to connect with your date. Deep listening is when you shut off the voices in your head and tune in to what the person across the table is saying. Granted, your critical voice may be wanting to sound off for a variety of reasons. She’s got a nervous giggle. He makes noise when he eats. Things like that can be distractions. Just notice yourself being distracted and bring yourself back. Don’t worry, you never have to go on a second date. This is an important practice, however, and it is an intimacy builder. Adopt this quality in your long term relationships by practicing now. By the way, you don’t have to use listening just in the dating world

4. Eye Contact. Don’t just make eye contact and nod your head. Practice deep listening while making eye contact. This is a wonderful display of your own generosity. And I can promise you, your generosity will come back to you.

5. Communicate. When it’s your time to talk, be clear and be heard. As you have given your attention to your date, expect the same. You haven’t interrupted him or her while he or she has been talking. If an interruption occurs, ask for the same manners. You can be polite and kind about this without turning it into a problem. Ask for what you want and chances are, you’ll get it. Feeling confident in your request takes alot of pressure off your date. You leave them firmly knowing what you prefer.

It doesn’t matter if your 25 or 75, dating – just like life – if approached as a fun game, where there are no losers, goes much more smoothly for everyone.