Posts Tagged ‘divorce court’
Infidelity Causes More Damage Than Ending A Marriage
Separation and divorce due to infidelity is one of the top reasons why people seek out a family lawyer. The other spouse cheated and it has wrecked the marriage. But it does more than just violate wedding vows. It can completely shake the bedrock of trust. The betrayed party will always wonder what it was that the other spouse was missing from their marriage. It can make an already difficult situation even worse. It is hard to get over and move past. Divorce attorneys see cheating as the number one reason why two people want to be rid of their marriage ties.
It is easy to think of infidelity as being physically intimate with someone other than a spouse. But there are other ways to cheat as well. A person can be involved emotionally with someone other than their spouse. The two may never touch each other physically but it can still be devastating on the faithful wife or husband. No matter what type of infidelities have occurred, all parties are hurt in the end and this can be reflected in the divorce settlement.
Divorce court is not a great place to have to air dirty laundry about infidelities. Most judges do not look favorably on a cheating spouse. In some states it is grounds enough to be granted alimony. There are very few cases of uncontested divorces where a partner has been cheating. Most are very bitter affairs that often require the services of a divorce mediation professional in order to come to a peaceful agreement.
If your partner has cheated on you but you are not quite ready to call it quits, then you can still find marriage help. It will take a lot of work to get the marriage back on track but it can happen. It requires counseling to uncover the reasons why one spouse strayed from the marriage bed. There will be a lot of hurt feelings that have to be overcome and it is entirely possible that you can never let the incident(s) go and that divorce will happen regardless of your efforts to save the marriage.
Infidelity is a devastating thing when it happens. You always wonder if it was something you did to drive your partner into the arms of a lover. There is always that doubt about whether or not your husband or wife ever truly loved you. If they did, then why did they betray you? The divorce laws may be on your side if and when you decide that you cannot live with a cheating partner but it does not make the emotional wounds any easier to deal with.
Will All Marriages Fail As The Number of Divorces Is On The Rise?
The number of divorces seems to rise each year. Getting a divorce attorney and having your marriage dissolved is very easy these days. All it takes is a series of paperwork and forms. In our modern times, the sanctity of marriage is not as sacred as it once was. Yet sustaining a successful marriage is hard work. In the initial stages of a relationship, everything is great. You do not pay attention to the small details that will later become insurmountable mountains of trouble. Divorce court is filled with people who thought their partner’s would change and were greatly shocked years later when things had not changed at all.
The number of divorces being sought these days can be daunting but if you want to beat the statistics, then you are going to have to work at being married. While those minor irritations that grew to huge problems over time are still driving you batty, there may be new problems that have surfaced. You cannot expect your partner to remain exactly the same as when you first met him or her. Going to your family law attorney and filing for dissolution of a marriage is easy, but going to a therapist and facing your marital problems head on, with the hope of making things better, is going to take some work.
So you and your partner are having trouble but you do not think you are quite ready to throw in the towel and go for a separation and divorce. That is great that you are willing to try to work it out. There is marriage help forums and counselors that can help you through the rocky times. There is not a single couple on this planet that has not had trouble at some time. Do you want the single best piece of advice that almost all counselors or therapists offer? You have to learn how to communicate. Most marriages fail because there is a lack of communication. It is not just about talking to each other. It is about letting the other know your wants and desires along with your needs. Communication works when two people are willing to listen to what the other person is saying and even what the other person is trying to communicate physically.
As the number of divorces go up, it is easy to become jaded and just scrap the marriage if there is trouble. Divorce laws make it easy to be free of your partner. You do not have to take this route. If you seek help for your marriage when times get troubled, then you can save your marriage and be happy at the same time.
What Are the Steps When Filing For Divorce?
If you want a decree for divorce, then you have to have reasons. There are not many couples who make it into divorce court that are divorcing simply because they were bored with each other. While it is true that you may be tired of your partner, there are usually problems that have arisen in the marriage making it hard to get along. Sometimes the dissolution of a marriage is the only option left that makes any sense. The fighting has become a constant factor in your daily life. No one should have to live a life like that. It may be time to consider separation and divorce.
In order for divorce to happen, each party must retain the services of a divorce attorney. Contrary to popular belief, you do not need an attorney if it is an uncontested divorce and there are many online divorce forms that you and your spouse fill out and then submit to the court. If there are children involved or there is going to be a dispute over property or finances, then you will need to contact a lawyer to help ensure that you are properly represented.
The first step to becoming separated divorced is to make plans to move out of the home. One of you has to move out of the home and you have to be living apart for a set amount of days. Divorce laws vary from state to state so you need to check with your attorney on how long you and your partner must be living apart before the divorce papers can be filed. During this time of separation, both parties need to get their finances in order. In uncontested divorces both parties come to mutual agreements on real estate, custody, child support and debts.
If you and your partner are not able to come to an agreement peacefully, then you may require the help of a divorce mediation professional. The professional will sit down with both you and your spouse, along with your attorneys, and try to come to an agreement over disputed items. If you can come to an agreement it is best for everyone. If you cannot, then it will have to go before a judge who will make the decision for you and your spouse.
After the paperwork for divorce has been filed with the family law court, you have to wait. Depending on how busy the court docket is will determine how long it will take for your case to come before a judge. Once the judge has reviewed the paperwork submitted by both your attorney and your spouse’s attorney, then he or she will grant the decree for ending the marriage. At that point you are officially single and no longer obligated to a spouse.
The Heartbreak of Child Custody Battles
Coming to an amicable divorce settlement in most cases is a fairly simple process. Many couples can come to an agreement without declaring a full scale war on each other. But often the disagreements begin when child custody is brought up during the divorce proceedings. The divorced parents often begin to argue with each other about who should receive custody and support. It can quickly turn into a bitter fight where no one escapes unscathed. The family unit is gone and in its place new arrangements must be made. It can be a difficult time for all involved.
Divorce attorneys will represent both parties so that there is a fair judgment. In most cases one parent will have full time custody and the other will have visitation rights. The non-custodial parent will have to pay a certain amount of money each month, based on income, to the custodial parent for child support. The divorce court will set the amount to be paid. Many times the non-custodial parent will have to pay through the court system. If they fail to pay child support, then they could have their taxes and wages garnisheed.
A family law attorney is the best source of information on how proper child custody arrangements should be made. The arrangements will specify visitation, as well as how much child support should be paid each week or month. One recent trend in divorces is for the judge to put in special clauses within the divorce settlement that specify how each adult should act when the child is around. This helps prevent one parent from belittling the other parent and keeping the child the center of attention, rather than a weapon to be used against the other parent.
The most important thing to remember as divorced parents is that you both are responsible for the life of a child. That child has the right to grow up in a household where love and respect is present. If you cannot tolerate your ex spouse, then do not let your child bear the brunt of that anger. Keep your feelings to yourself and try to be respectful.
Divorced parents have a huge responsibility when child custody is involved. Yes, you may be angry at your former spouse but your child should never bear the brunt of your anger or hear you belittling your ex. You may have lost a spouse but your child has lost a full time parent. There are going to be emotional issues to deal with so seeking out a therapist may be beneficial to everyone involved.
The Vast Sensationalism of Celebrity Divorces
If your separation and divorce did not make the cover of People Magazine, then do not feel bad. Most people’s affairs are not covered by gossip magazines. But celebrity divorces are a constant in the media. People wanted to know every little detail of Jennifer Anniston and Brad Pitt’s split. Your divorce attorney did not have his name plastered in the gossip rags but theirs did. What is it about a celebrity couple getting divorced that seems to grab the attention of everyone?
Divorce court is filled with couples airing dirty laundry about each other. But very few cases ever receive the same attention that celebrity divorces receive. The year 2009 saw the divorce of Madonna and Guy Ritchie. People were shocked because they had been together for several years and could not quite believe all of the rumors that were surfacing. Gossip rags had a field day with the “he said/she said” allegations that were flying between the two. Couples that seem happy and content in their celebrity marriages rarely make the news.
Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson is one celebrity couple that has managed to stay away from an attorney and a divorce settlement. Things seem pretty good for them and you rarely see any rumors surfacing in the gossip rags. Britney Spears and Kevin Federline, however, were one of the Hollywood couples that experts said would divorce quickly. They did manage to stay together for awhile but they ended up divorcing and it has been a constant tabloid sensation since. There have been much faster separations and divorces though. Take for example Nicholas Cage and Lisa Marie Presley. They married in August of 2002 but just three months later a separation was filed. It almost seems as if the divorce papers were signed at start of the marriage.
Finding out that your neighbors or coworkers are having uncontested divorces is not very sensational. After all, how much could truly be at stake? But in the case of a celebrity divorce, people want to know all of the nitty, gritty details. The papers always point to infidelity but there is often more to these separations than what you read. It is easy to view celebrities as iconic figures that are above the everyday mundane tasks that people go through.
For all those who eagerly await celebrity divorces, there are some who want to see celebrity couples make it. Being a celebrity just amplifies every problem. If you are going through a divorce and are battling it out in divorce court, then it suddenly does not seem so bad when compared to the fanfare and censure that celebrities receive. You are not the only one to have a cheating spouse or be in an abusive relationship. It brings celebrities down to a normal level that the everyday Joe can relate with.
Useful Tips On How To Deal With Divorce Court
Your actions in divorce court can have a tremendous outcome on your divorce settlement. Judges will look at all the evidence presented to them by both attorneys before deciding a case, but actions can speak louder than the written word. If you fail to conduct yourself in an orderly manner, you could loose some of the concessions regarding property division or custody and visitation rights for your children.
Before entering divorce court, it is vitally important that your lawyer and you work out as many details and issues as possible with your spouse’s lawyer. This is usually performed in what is called an early settlement panel, or divorce mediation. This panel takes place in a court house and is attended by your soon-to-be ex-spouse, you and both attorneys. Family law attorneys listen to both sides of the divorce settlement while both counselors go over property divisions, any marital debt that has accumulated and any other issues that comprise the marital settlement agreement. This process can be extremely helpful because it allows many of the issues to be settled between the couople before a judge even hears the case. In some instances, such as in divorce mediations, issues can be resolved and agreed upon without ever having to go to divorce court.
We have all seen cases on television or in the movies where couples are brought into divorce court, and in the end the “good spouse” wins. In reality, this is not so much the case. A judge has the free will to make his or her own decisions about a case, and that decision may not always be in favor of you. When proceeding with a divorce settlement, it is important to remember this fact because it will help you retain a cool demeanor in front of the judge if something is decided against you. The most difficult time to do this, of course, is when children are involved. What a judge decides regarding child custody and visitation rights will rest on the evidence your lawyer presents and the custody laws governing your state. But often a judge makes his or her decision about joint physical custody based on their personal instincts. So it is important to enter a courtroom with an open mind and a clear outlook on how things could turn out in the end.
Your family law attorney can guide you through your time spent in divorce court. Following their lead is very important, especially if you need to speak in front of the judge. As with any other profession, common courtesy is expected in a court of law. This means always addressing the judge as “your honor,” and remembering to thank him or her for your time in front of the bench. If you are trying to present yourself in a professional manner, remember to never make snide or condescending remarks to your spouse. This will only cause you more harm in terms of the divorce settlement. When a joint physical custody battle occurs between you and your spouse, keeping your cool can be difficult. Never bring the children into the courtroom because it will only make things more difficult for everyone involved. Lawyers will always come prepared to court, but to help obtain all the information discussed in divorce court, take notes that will assist your attorney with the proceedings. Being prepared as possible will only benefit you, and hopefully bring about a positive outcome in the end.
Divorce court appearances can be short-lived or drawn out over months at a time. The best way to keep your proceeding relatively brief is by remaining mindful of your actions during the ordeal. Going in with the realization that a judge may not rule in your favor will help you maintain the dignity needed to make it through the settlement with a few bumps and minimal scars. Unlike many of the celebrity divorces shown on television, divorce proceedings for average couples can be done with speed, accuracy and little bickering. Remembering the proper etiquette while following your lawyers lead will help the overall experience.