Survive Your Breakup

Posts Tagged ‘save relationship’

Oftentimes, when we are having issues in relationships, we are stuck in a struggle of ego with our beloved, which can be difficult to settle if both sides refuse to give in.  When this kind of things occurs, both parties tend to look for all types of methods to make the other party admit to his/her own issues, because each party most likely thinks that he/she is right.

All kinds of relationship issues can occur as a result of the damage done by constant battle of ego between the lovers.  You must then ask yourself to what degree you are willing to compromise your own values in order to preserve your relationship.  In order to keep your lover when you know he/she won’t give in, are you still willing to give up your values?

It is not an easy thing to both make our partner happy and still be able to keep our own integrity, as you might have already experienced during your arguments with your partner.  How far can you give up your own values without feeling you are severely compromised by the relationship or your lover?

Here is a very wonderful guide to save your relationship while keeping your own values, please check out: Problems In Relationships – Giving In?

When we think about the question of whether we should give in, we can find a paradox if we really look into the question.  In order to preserve our relationship, if we really must bend our own values, then are we still saving our relationship?  The truth is, a loving relationhship really should not require us to do that.  A truly loving relationship is a relationship in which each person accepts and even values the differences between them. 

When we have problems in relationships, we truly have great opportunities to understand each other and learn.  Therefore, I believe that we should look at these questions from the perspective of each person growing and learning from their differences in values, instead of looking at them in terms of bending values to accommodate another person.

Almost all fulfilling relationships present challenges, opportunities, and problems in relationships for each partner to face, learn, and grow from their differences in values, personalities, habits, etc.  When one or both partners are reluctant to see the differences as opportunities for growth, then they will have problems.

Opportunities for learning and growth can be lost if one partner does not feel that he/she is accepted by the other partner and chooses to withdraw from the trouble when the differences become a sore-thumb in the relationship.  The issue can turn into an unhealthy one when the issue drags on without any improvement and the other partner is then directly or indirectly forced to yield or decide if he/she wants to stay in the relationship.

To get wonderful tips on welcoming relationship challenges, and other secrets to rescue relationship, be sure to check out: Problems In Relationship – Welcome The Challenges.

Before both lovers successfully know how to handle their troubles in relationship and appreciate them, they are bound to have conflicts, of which the outcome depend entirely upon intent.  In general, there are two possible intents in any given moment: The intent to protect against pain or the intent to learn about love.

When one or both partners have the intent to protect against pain, they will find many controlling ways to avoid dealing with the problems in relationships.  They may act defensive, argue, blame, withdraw, resist, explain, give in, etc.  When the partners dance around the real issues in their relationship in order to avoid the pain of facing the problems, they really lose the opportunity to learn and grow from their issues.

This will always lead to distance and unhappiness in the relationship.  The problem will always remain when the partners are unwilling to learn and grow from their differences, because the real and actual problem is not the differences, but rather the partners’ unwillingness.  Differences between partners can be fertile ground for real spiritual growth and personal development if both partners are willing to learn and grow from their differences and problems in their relationship.

We don’t have the power to control others, not even our lovers.  However, we can control ourselves and what we do.  It is actually very difficult to rely on our partner to change his/her attitude so that we can have a good relationship.  We should do it first.  If you are in relationships where your partner refuses to learn and grow from the problems in relationships, then you need to be honest with yourself regarding how much of yourself you can give up and still maintain a sense of integrity.  It is still worthwhile to work on the issue from your side so that your relationship can be saved as long as you do not feel that you are compromising your integrity as a person.

When you are trying to give up your own integrity in order to save your relationship, you are really indirectly hurting your relationship, and this is not healthy and a good solution to your problems in relationship.  When we compromise ourselves to preserve the relationship, we will subconsciously be resentful of the relationship or our partner, and it is only a matter of time before the relationship falls apart.  The real solution and growth happens when both partners manage to sincerely and respectfully value their differences and not stubbornly want the other partner to give up his/her own values.

I hope this article is helpful to you. Here is a website that contains my review of the best relationship problem advice programs that I have come across: Best Rescue Relationship Guides.

Have you ever felt like there is nothing you can do to save your relationship? You do not need to feel like this because with every relationship there is always hope. However, you should know the best ways to keep your relationship together, or else you could make a bad situation worse. When you say I want to get my lover back,you should know how to prevent this situation from happening in the fist place.

The first thing you should attempt to do is to rekindle the love and romance the two of you once had together. The best way is to bring back the romance that first brought the two of you together. One very effective way to rekindle love is to start spending more time together. A good idea is to take a break from your crazy work schedules and spend that time on a mini vacation for just the two of you. If you spend quality time alone, then you’ll discover that this is one the best way to patch things up and bring back the romance to your relationship.

Communication is the cornerstone in every relationship. Difficult situations always seems to work out when there is good two way communication between couples. Don’t be afraid to let your partner know what you want and don’t want, and what you’re willing to compromise on. You have to make your partner understand that you want a long lasting relationship and that you are willing to compromise to keep them in your life.

Do not ignore the emotions of your partner. Men are very often guilty of this because they usually try to avoid talking about their feelings if they can get away with it. If you are unable to give your partner the emotional support he or she wants it can be painful and harm their self-esteem. When your partner has a difficult time seeing how much you do them, it can hurt and can harm your relationship.  Women thrive on emotions that men often do not acknowledge. These seemingly unavoidable difference can often be overcome by just communicating and listening with your partner.

Every relationship seems to have it’s fair share of arguments, but the key is to not make the argument personal. What ever you do, don’t call the other person names, because this is nothing more than verbal abuse. Using derogatory names about someone you care for can have a long lasting, negative effect on your future relationship. Also, Do not keep digging up uncomfortable situations from the past. If you find yourself arguing with your partner, keep your disagreements focused on the current problem at hand. By dragging past issues into the mix, things will never be resolved.

If you want to save a troubled relationship it’s never going to be easy, but if you are able to put in the time and effort needed, then you’ll be able to save your relationship. For more detailed information visit Save a Relationship.